I have been wondering about fame. People seem to want to be famous. Of course, I’ve never been truly famous. I’m not an Olympic athlete, a best-selling author, a legendary professor, or a public speaker of renown.

But though I am not famous, I am a world champion, a published author, a respected teacher, and a successful public speaker.

To be clear, my championships were for Over-50 competition in a niche sport, my publisher didn’t renew my contract, I have retired from teaching, and my public speaking was at educational conferences.

But occasionally, because of those things, people did treat me as if I was famous. And it’s a very mixed bag.

I liked the bits where people gave me a little respect, recognized me, or were familiar with my work. It was sort of nice to get awards, though they tend to be political and I don’t take them personally. Getting personalized rejection notes from editors who remember my work is sort of nice. I guess. Having the headmaster at the school where I worked introduce me as “our world champion” was neat the first time he did it.

However, people I have never met before, but who know me, have spoken to me angrily, dismissed my contributions, or made demands on me. They have insulted my work to my face, interrupted me in private conversations, or (and this was truly weird) pursued me, as if I owed them a relationship.

I know, I know, this sounds like a combination of braggadocio and ingratitude. Surely I should be grateful for my tiny amount of fame? Surely I should bask in the glow of being known?

I guess. But fame doesn’t pay the bills, or extend the life span. I don’t even go around glowing with the knowledge that someone else in the world knows who I am. I just get the occasional rude surprise when I introduce myself to someone and they say in a grumpy voice, “Oh, I know who you are,” and then turn away, automatically offended by my existence.

The occasional short appreciative fan letter is golden, though, I have to admit.

I write them to people myself, sometimes. Not because they’re famous, though. Because they did good work, and it made me happy.